Taking on the utilities

Electric Company
Originally uploaded by My name is Saffanna.

Over the past 2 days in my new apartment, I've been hacking into wireless internet service provided by some kind-hearted (and hopefully oblivious) neighbour. The only problem with that is, whenever he/she logs off, my connection shuts down too - no matter what I'm in the middle of doing at the time.

But given that I'm no thief, and that I want to dictate my own internet usage in future thanksverymuch, I decided today to get my own internet service. And so drawing on everything I knew about utilities (thanks to Monopoly), I called the phone company to commence negotiations.

What followed was an exhaustive discussion about who I am, where I live, where I've come from, what ID I do and don't have, and what kind of complicated per-month plan I want to get. And despite all the technical jargon and financial mumbo-jumbo, I kept up. And I settled on a plan and made my decision.

Naturally I have to fax off everything except a dental impression over to the phone company so they can verify my information and credit history (of which I have none). Ownership was never this complicated on the Monopoly board. But with any luck, I'll be wired for light and sound within 24 hours all on my own terms. And that sounds good to me.

And naturally I will protect my wireless connection with security so that no free-loading neighbours of mine can hack in. Bwahahaha.

Oh man I just realised something. When I finally get a TV, I'll have to go through all this again with the cable company. Oh joy and rapture! Bring it.