Monday, January 15, 2007

Puckering up, in the name of research


elusive
Originally uploaded by Carrie Taylor.

With the Australia Day Ball less than two weeks away, the bets are on at work about whether I will smooch someone at the big event. Mero thinks no, but Biggsy reckons yes.

I don't know why we're betting on this, but I guess it goes to show that Aussies really will bet on anything.

But hey, who are we fooling? We all know that in the case of my permanent pucker, things could go either way. What can I say? I am the Kissing Bandit.

Mikey loves to tell people that I'm like one of those limpits, forever suctioned to the bottom of a shark. Such is the way I will moonlight around a venue, attached to some hapless male with no idea what he's gotten himself into. Harsh but fair, I suppose.

And equally I wonder what better way to find my prince than to kiss a lot of frogs, right? Dedicated research and a commitment to the task are the only ways forward, as I have always (ie never) said.

And with Biggsy and Mero being ever-watchful for my smoochy indiscretions, perhaps only time will tell whether the Handsome Prince will be found on the Hotel dancefloor.

Between you and me, the Aussie party at the Cubby Bear this coming weekend is the more likely location for a smooch, if last year's shenanigans were anything to go by. I seem to recall a young man suggesting he was VERY into me, only to realise that he had been making all the same moves on the female bartender. I had to give the guy props - he was working his magic on two sides of the dancefloor; he must have been exhausted. When she approached us and threw his coat at him, to storm off in an Oscar-worthy huff, all I could do was laugh and encourage him to chase after her. I'd suggest that I was being noble in defeat but then again, he was the one who lost out in the long run - right?

So there we have it, folks. The bets rage about whether or not thsi blogging heroine will find her prince at the Ball and then fix him with a giant smooch. It worked in stories, now stay tuned for the real-life version.

12 comments:

glamah16 said...

Where does time fly? That were we first met at Cubby Bear.

batreg said...

Honey, if you find any 'handsome prince' on the hotel 'floor' - best step on over him and walk away ...

kilabyte said...

Especially if he's 'on the floor' - probably means he's gassed and gone.

batreg said...

Alternately you could do a kathy Bates, grab him by the ankles and drag him home ... Misery was inspirational - don't you think??

Gab said...

Hear, hear Reg

I think Steven King said it best: The way to a man's heart is through smashing his ankles with a sledgehammer.

Anonymous said...

I've been one of those poor guys you attach yourself to. Good luck to the Chigago boys this year, they will need it

Jammin' Jemma said...

Gab, Chicago boys are lucky to kiss you - hear that boys - LUCKY I tell ya!!!

Gab said...

Ha thanks Jammin' Jems. I don't know about that so much, but "anonymous" (if that's his real name) does illustrate a very good point. I may attach myself to hapless victims, but they always live to fight another day.

batreg said...

Unless you take super glue as lipgloss can you really ever truly be accused of being attached?? I wanna see stitches, hand cuffs or aforementioned glue as proof

Jammin' Jemma said...

I think "anonymous" is being very Secret Squirrel - saying he has experienced your lips of passion (and passionate they are!) but then not saying who he is.....

Is he.....scared? (when you've read that you have to picture the 2001 Space Odyssey drum beat in your head - adds to the effect)

Or maybe he's horribly disfigured? Oh hang on, that's Phantom of the Opera - wrong drama!

Anonymous said...

Obviously WAY too much coffee guys !!!!!

batreg said...

Diversionary tactics hey ... where is the coffee??