Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Barstool Philosophy

barstools at the Gold Dust Lounge
Originally uploaded by the earthling.

Aussies have long suspected that Americans are very in touch with their feelings. You need only look through weepy eyes at an Oprah show, or listen to Dr Phil give some hapless husband a verbal bashing to know that. And when you live in this country, you're constantly bombarded with the recommendation to "own your own feelings" and to rely on the healing power of hugs and other such touchy-feeling phenomena.

But here's what I say. You can keep your psychiatrist couch and your therapy bills and your hands-on hippie healing. I suspect that all I need is a barstool and an Amstel Light or two, and I can solve all my problems!

Last night P and me ended up at Joe's on Broadway, musing about everything from life in Australia, to life in Chicago, to whether horse races run clockwise or anti-clockwise. Yes friends, our conversation really was that random.

But we also talked about getting older and what the importance might be of setting goals for ourselves for the next few years. Should we bother being so rigid, or should we instead just sit back and enjoy the ride? We talked about married friends and we wondered whether they look back on their unaccomplished goals - was getting married really their first priority? Is it wrong that it's not mine? Will I ever regret travelling first and getting married later? What would my life have been like if I'd done it all the other way around?

And after all this to-ing and fro-ing, we resolved that it doesn't make a bloody difference anyway. You only get one life and you'll never know what might have been, so you shouldn't sweat it anyway. So I guess the only thing for me to keep doing is to enjoy this rollercoaster of life until the ticket booth guy - or perhaps Oprah or Dr Phil - tells me I'm too old and I should shove off.

And if anyone knows in which direction horses run in the Melbourne Cup, could you let me know? There's an Amstel Light in it for you.


dodgey said...



Anonymous said...

Ahhh grasshopper, when you're in the northern hemisphere, and in time-continuum spatial terms only, does a clock run anti-clockwise when compared directly with a clock running in the southern hemisphere .... or is it time for another beer and then a nap???!!!???

Gab said...

Dodgey scores an Amstel for sheer certainty that his answer his correct. Anonymous, I need to have an Amstel to decipher your answer. I best ask the barkeep to grab one for you too :)

Anonymous said...

interesting..... a water clock could very well be opposite so of course the armature mechanism would have to be reversed to compensate for this.

notwithstanding the above, the barman will always tell u what time it is when he chucks u out, so u dont really need to know how or why a clock actually works

Gab said...

And for using 'armature mechanism' in a sentence, you get an Amstel.

At this rate I'm gonna run out of Amstels.

batreg said...

I agree with Dodge ... I'm definitely anti, anti what I'm not sure but is much better than being a 'yes' gal!

Anonymous said...

....c'mon Reggie .... you've used YES on a few occasions ....