An unequivocal challenge was issued at the Consulate this morning: does Biggsy or my boss make the best paella in the universe? And clearly the only way this will be resolved is with a paella cook-off.
I nominated myself the Drinks Wench, partly because it's the only way I could possibly allow myself to contribute to this meal. I say this because the only other time I helped make paella, it was an utter classic mess. Permit me to explain....
Kate and I were living at the flat and she had decided to make paella. I had never eaten it before, but one glance at the recipe convinced me that this was a meal I was going to enjoy. All my favourite things were in there - meat, shellfish, rice, veggies, even saffron for pity's sake! What could be bad about that?! So one afternoon, having procured all the goodies at the best local shops ever, the North Adelaide Village, we set about preparing the feast.
Assigning herself the role of resident fishmonger, Kate set about cleaning and preparing the seafood. I was responsible for the poultry. Not such a big deal, but bear in mind Kate and I had been clever (aka frugal) and purchased a whole chicken - bones, giblety things and all. So I basically had to bone an entire chicken. Bear in mind people, that this is something that poultry people train for years to get right!
So while Kate effortlessly snipped scallops and pruned prawns, I referred to the "Women's Weekly Cookbook for Rookies" and followed the step-by-step guide to boning a chicken. Crushing its little sternum was just about the last straw. Slowly but surely the poor chicken carcass resembled a chicken pancake. And even though I'd been crushing and cutting for what felt like days, I was getting nowhere fast. Kate's shellfish were neatly presented in individual little bowls and, by contrast, all I was doing was the equivalent of chicken origami.
Somehow it all worked out, because the ingredients came together in one of the most delicious meals I have ever enjoyed (for days and days). And so what that every time we used the pan after that night, little bits of saffron liquid oozed out of some unidentified location?! So while I think the Consulate's paella cook-off will be fun, I somehow don't think it will stack up to the "Kate and Gab" effort.
This time I've volunteered to bring the margaritas, and stand back to watch it all play out....
6 comments:
Katie has done good since then too. I remember a particularly luvly home-cooked meal in Paris that 3 geriatrics were really hangin' out for. We had reached the end of the "baguette-trail".
If Biggsey has anything to do with paella I hope he's sober when he's making it otherwise it could start out as rice and end up as porridge - or 'wet-rice' as Susan Miller calls it.
We wouldn't let Spoggy do anything like that - she'd have all the ingredients together and it would still come out looking and tasting like lasagne. Nice tasting mind ya ... but still lasagne.
Hey! Lasagne is not my ONLY recipe thank you very much Goal Attack!
I can make spaghetti bolognese, noodles bolognese and rice bolognese.
And I can make fried spaghetti, fried noodles and fried rice.
And I can make bolognese on toast too.
And if the cook-off goes badly then it's ....... FOOD FIGHT .....
What pray tell is the matter with porrige - poured in a drawer to set it slices beautifully for months
Oh Jems you are a scream. And thank god you've given up cooking everything with chilli. I'm only just getting feeling back in my tastebuds now.
And Reg, after eating game pie in Scotland, I'm probably 'game' for anything. boom boom. ahh i got a million of em!
What fab memories! You know I used that pan in November when I was home and it is still leaking yellow liquid. That must be three years or so at least! I am sure we can try again in April when I am there to cook up a storm
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