Oh my aching chest

I've been having anxiety chest pains this week, brought on by the ever-present and looming reminder that my 9,000 word thesis for Uni is due next Tuesday.


I have actually started the paper, which is a relief. In fact, I'm nearly 3,000 words into it - which is a relief AND a miracle. But it's just a shame that the chest pains won't subside until next week. I'm quite fortunate in that I can make them go away by not thinking about my paper - but the more that the deadline creeps back into my consciousness, the more I feel like I'm going to keel over.


I can remember an episode of "The Simpsons" in which Miss Hoover (Lisa's teacher, for the heathens amongst you) escapes her crazy classroom on a particularly stressful day, massaging her temples in the hallway chanting "calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean". I don't have such a mantra, but I think I should get one. What would it be? Surely it has to be comprised of my favourite, most relaxing things....so, let's see:

• Coffee in Paris, coffee in Paris
  
• Pizza in Rome, pizza in Rome
  
• Warm cosy doona, warm cosy doona
  
• Shopping anywhere, shopping anywhere
  
• Musty old bookshop, musty old bookshop
  

Okay well I've chanted and massaged my temples for a good 3 minutes and nothing. My paper is still there, and so are the chest pains. Maybe I should try the "this time next week it will all be over" mantra....a bit longer than the others, but arguably more effective!